monday june 11 2001    |    2:17 a.m.

the past few weeks (three now?) since i've been home have been a blur of late nights and phone calls and sleep. i haven't quite known what to say here. but i'm trying to get back in touch with my inner, daily-updated diaryland.

i'm coming to columbus in two weeks or so to see & stay with the boy. tomorrow i'm calling the airline to find out exactly how to cash in my skymiles -- i'm glad all that flying to and from school finally paid off -- and then it'll just be a matter of exchanging the miles certificate for plane tickets, i think.

i'm introducing the idea of mark slowly to my parents. i thought my mom would be the hardest to win over, but actually she was surprisingly receptive, and we ended up having a good, much-needed talk. dad has an idea, but i don't think he suspects the full extent of it.

so! excitement! i hope to see other people i love while i'm there: ben and you and you and you, and maybe my favorite correspondant can come visit for a couple of days, and iowa isn't very far away, and cleveland definitely isn't either! so how about some coffee (or anything, really) dates?

the good thing about putting my life on hold, more or less, for two weeks, is just that: i get to put my life on hold, more or less, for two weeks. good excuse not to start working quite yet, and to extend this breather i've been needing. i might have a job working for dade county public tv, but i won't find out until three or so weeks from now, so for the time being i can allow myself to be completely lazy. maybe i can't afford to, but i can definitely allow myself to, no?

on troubled/ing friendship news, things are much better. patrick and i have been having long, draining talks and have managed to avoid outright nastiness, so i think things might improve. last night the four of us went to coconut grove to have drinks, and it was the best it's been in longer than i can remember.

[unrelated note: in another life, i think i would have wanted to be an egyptologist.]

beginnings and endings, all together and all huge and all happening in a maddening period of apparent inaction. funny how that goes. julie leaves for bulgaria next monday -- right there, two years, and it'll just happen from one day to the next. i feel like it should be marked by earthquakes or something.

but i shouldn't even bring up natural disasters. not at all. i really hope everything is ok in houston...

[also, and not necessarily related to that directly above: el oso is back!]

i've finally progressed from the entertainment weeklys to the national geographics, thank goodness. and thomas wolfe. when i'm not on the phone, which isn't often. grin|grin

johnny burned me a cd with a new depeche mode song ("freelove") on it, and i am so disappointed. martin gore's never been a stellar wordsmith, but these lyrics are just bad and aimless, and the song itself sounds like it might have not made the cut the first time around on ultra. it makes me sad. but i love them and i want to get the new album and i only hope the rest of it surprises me pleasantly.

miami is working its darkish charm on me again: been listening to the cure and wolfsheim and the smiths and joy division and concrete blonde. sighs.